Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize
