you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Randomize
