Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
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