1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Randomize
