I hate all girls vehemently.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
