i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize