Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
