Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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