there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I'm like, not good at living.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Randomize
