the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Randomize
