I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Found your dick twin last night
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
