i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
