He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
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