At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
