She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
