That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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