sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
