At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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