That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
