after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
