i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize