i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Randomize
