Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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