Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
