there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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