I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
