ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Randomize
