Screwed.edu
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
She told me I should be a condom model.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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