This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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