And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
