Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
