debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Brb crying the tears of my youth
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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