similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
