No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
