He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
