Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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