Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
