I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
