ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Randomize
