She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
My vagina is very pro this idea
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
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