I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Farmville is her only friend.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
