in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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