It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Randomize
