We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
