I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Randomize
