bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Randomize