Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
