Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
