Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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