Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
